Monday, January 21, 2008

No Hands Jenny

It is freakin' cold out here in New Yorksey today. So cold, in fact, that I thought my hands might fall off turning me into an actress affectionately known as, "No Hands Jenny." It doesn't help that I apparently think that I can wear whatever I want as long as I wear it with tights. Today my ingenious choice was a dress built for summer wear with bright purple tights - did I mention it was FREEZING outside? Oh, did I also mention that I forgot to bring a hat and gloves? Did I also mention that I am an idiot? Good, I'm glad we've cleared that up. Lesson learned: I don't carry around the biggest shoulder bag that New York has ever seen to be unprepared - tomorrow I'll be stuffing extra everything in there.
Briann and I auditioned for the Amish today. I wish I was kidding, but the theatre really is called Amish Acres. I suppose it would have been good to know that before I decided to sing a cute song about infidelity...you know how hilarious the Amish think infidelity is.
In other news, our Landlord, Rob, came over today to give us a lightbulb and collect our lease. I realized when Rob came in and started looking around that at that particular moment, our laptops were sitting on my bed looking very "His and Hers" and that the picture of us hugging on the fridge, our cute table for two,  Briann's unfinished room, and our talk of inviting some "Girlfriends" over for dinner were all coming together to make us look like a lovely couple to our Jersey Boy landlord. As he started to look around suspiciously I realized that there is no way to tell your landlord that you aren't a Lesbian couple without it getting really awkward. 
Well, here's to being no handed vegetarian Lesbian's in the city, singing for the Amish, and changing our own lightbulbs - which is really hard to do without hands!
 - J
*No harm meant to Lesbians, Amish, or no handed people.

2 comments:

ferrisface said...

Can I adopt the term New Yorksey?

olddominionoldies said...

J. - CONGRATULATIONS!!! Your blog is funny - and your writing is entertaining, and I hope you didn't model the Wicked Step-Mother after ME!!! A. Linda